Ladies

I think every young girl at some point in her lifetime ponders over whether or not she could ever be a lesbian...

I'm not so sure if I could handle it though,
I mean, what if I failed to satisfy them!



They'd fuckin rip me to shreds!

Filthy, delicious capitalism

Not that I'm turning into her or anything


But I really really really really want these things






to listen to






and these to wear

Why do you always needs things so intensely when you don't have any money.

There's this book called 'Down and out in Paris and London' George Orwell's first and he basically lives like a tramp in these two places to see what it's like. Theres this one bit where him and his friend have completely run out of money and are almost starving to death; all they want to do is write carefully planned imaginery menus with all their favorite foods on it, what they would order if they had any money. I know that feeling 'if I only had a hundred pounds I could buy this or that and then I would be satisfied. An it's wierd because you always know exactly what you would do when you dream of getting something which is slightly out of your reach finacially and you think you know that one thing will make you content.
That's how people get addicted to shopping, it's the adrenalin rush of 'this is the last thing I ever need to buy because it's going be your tool for accessing what you are currently barred from and when you do get it, it's going to totally change your life.' Particularly buying on credit because thats sort of a way of getting what you want without it really being yours at all.
I think that's why some rich people have horrible taste, because they have all this money and they forget about all the things they used to want so much or they are in the wrong context, they sort of sold their imagination.

Well, I do need some new summer stuff, that's my excuse anyway

xxx

Catchcup

It seems for the first time in my whole life, I have a reasonably decent sized rack.
I was in Topshop with my friend and she remarked that my boobs looked really big and it was then that I realised none of my bras really fit anymore, it just hadn't really registered.
So I went to Marks and Sparks and got fitted and I have officially gained a cup size
34c awwooooo!
Kinda cool, I've always been pair shaped but now I have a waist and boobs.

...I hope I haven't joined the pudding club!